U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
