the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
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