nut hugger
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
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