Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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