White coat. Heels.
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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