ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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