Where did you get a picture of my penis
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Randomize
