mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
You're like the curious george of whores
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize
