just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
