I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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