Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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