yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Randomize
