i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
