Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
why is half of my head shaved?
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize