If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
