so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
