Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
