she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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