I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Randomize
