somebody snuck up and got me drunk
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I feel like a drive thru vagina
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
