when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
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