I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
i am craving dick and cupcakes
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
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