You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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