I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
