Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Randomize
