Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
