We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
Randomize
