We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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