I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
try to milk me bitch
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize
