her vagine was all disorganized.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize