I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
It's blow job season.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
