Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Everclear isn't food dammit
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
