Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
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