Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
