you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
