He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Randomize
