Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
