I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
