are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize
