Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
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