First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
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