This girl is more easily done than said...
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
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