Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
