I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
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