awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
