So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
