Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
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