you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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