i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
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