Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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